Saturday, February 6, 2010
Friday, February 5, 2010
Legalizing Marijuana: The Economic Benefits
Don’t get the wrong idea. We are not all potheads here at brobrobrodude, but prohibition on marijuana is just absurd. Let me start by explaining why it was made illegal in the first place.
The Marijuana Tax Act was created in 1937. It didn’t criminalize marijuana but rather forced everyone using it or growing it to have a stamp for it. However, the government wasn’t giving any out. This essentially made it illegal to possess or grow marijuana. The main reason this law was passed can be tied directly to racism. It was done because Mexicans and African Americans were mostly the ones who used marijuana recreationally and people like Henry Anslinger, the Commissioner of the FBI at the time, wanted to ruin all their fun. Anslinger ran smear campaigns through outrageous films such as “Reefer Madness,” to ruin the image of marijuana.
Time and time again, scientific studies have shown that marijuana has no long term health effects and there is no record of anyone EVER dying from marijuana use. Yet things like cigarettes and alcohol which kill millions of people worldwide every year remain completely legal. But enough about the basics… and on to the real reason for this post: why legalizing marijuana could be a great boost to this economy that is in the worst recession since the Great Depression.
Hemp is a material made from marijuana plants that can be used to make over 25,000 different products from clothes to paper. Before it was made illegal, it was the largest agricultural crop in the world! These days, the underground marijuana industry is a multi-billion dollar industry despite the fact that it is illegal. Making more products from hemp could have countless positive outcomes. It could help our pollution in this country because the products would be organic and it could also create many jobs. The marijuana industry itself could create many jobs, from growers to distributors. Our unemployment rate is in the double digits and more jobs could do nothing but help the situation. There is currently an estimated 50 million people in America who use marijuana. If the government made it legal and taxed it, there could be billions of dollars in revenue to help the $12.3 trillion debt that we are in, or maybe even put us in a surplus which has been done only once in the past 40 years, by the Clinton Administration. There are 45,000 people in jail in the U.S. because of weed related issues. There is even more money we could save by not having to provide for all of those people every day. According to Jeffrey Miron, an economics professor at Harvard University, “the government could save $7.7 billion every year if it didn’t have to spend money policing and prosecuting marijuana activity.” This year alone, there has already been $5 billion spent on the war on drugs in the United States. That’s just over a month! And yet marijuana is still illegal and our debt is growing at an astounding rate. Something has to be done to fix the economy and these asinine stimulus bills are not working. Marijuana legalization may not be the only solution to that problem or the best one, but it sure as hell would help.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Franklin's Rant- Stop fucking singing at parties...ya fucks
It’s Friday night, I’m sipping on “my drank” and I, for the most part, am having a good time. The week of troubles being washed away 12oz at a time from a clear plastic cup of brown alcoholic nectar. Then, it happens, a song that has plagued my ears more than a thousand times starts. The cackling of the pack of girls standing near me fades out into inane screams of, “OH MY GOD YAAAAAAY!” The group of assholes I saw earlier are now wrapped in each others’ arms swaying back and forth to the rhythm of the song. My mind begins to process all the information that is occurring around me. A single thought pops into my head, “Fuck…”
The fact that I even have to address this issue is beyond tedium. The hebetudinous of the people that participate in these exercises in idiocy frustrate me to the point of complete mental exhaustion. The act leaves me in a somewhat phlegmatic state, where I can do nothing but shit and piss myself while staring at my dilapidated Brookwood off white ceiling tiles. Why do the masses feel that this practice is necessary? It is completely incompetent. What I am talking about is group singing at parties.
First off, the majority of people who participate in this most likely do not listen to Bon Jovi or Journey while they are alone, so why is it necessary to scream the lyrics of these songs in a social setting with a bunch of other blithering idiots? No response? Well, fortunately for you I have formulated several hypotheses for this.
Hypothesis 1: Idiots have become self aware, if this is the case then the singing is acting as some sort of town bell, a bat signal if you will. Unlike Gotham’s Dark Knight it seems that this signal is more of a calling out to the world that, “Hey I’m a fucking idiot! Where my peers at ya herrrrrr maaayy???” Typically afterwards I would imagine they gather together in primitive groups discussing anything ranging from how many paint chips it took them to eat to get high last Tuesday or how long they tried fitting the square block in the circle hole before coming to the party.
Hypothesis 2: It is a mating call to other dumbass mother fuckers of the opposite sex. I have come to this hypothesis from extensive field work and observation. Unfortunately I believe that my IQ may have dropped a couple of points while being constantly surrounded by these individuals. BUT, that was a sacrifice I was willing to make for science. Back to what I was saying, typically a male will be in charge of the musical device and will prompt the singing (more on him later). When this happens the females will follow suit. Thus, it must be some sort of idiot mating ritual, which is probably followed by 30 seconds of belly button sex between the two.
Hypothesis 3: There is no answer. The situation is so fucking dumb that it is beyond the possibility of explanation entirely. Even through vigorous contemplation and deductive reasoning, the obtuse nature of the act must be completely incomprehensible.
One can only postulate as to which of these is actually true, some would surmise that further pontification on the subject would be dispensable. However, this is Brobrobrodude.blogspot.com, which means you need to shut that filthy fucking sewer you call a mouth and listen.
The final topic that I have to discuss before I bring this disquisition to a close, this is the subject of the fuckhole that I have deemed, “Teh Clown”.
This is the individual is the one who leads the parade of fools in song and will fall under the category of tool if in a frat/sorority. He/She is the loudest mother fuck in the immediate area, moreover, this person has the annoying characteristic of knowing every fucking word in every dumb fuck song. This person unfortunately is in control of the music device and continually puts stupid shit on, namely sing along songs. The mind reels when trying to understand the “Teh Clown” through rational thought. “Teh Clown” tries to gain recognition from their peers by doing this, unfortunately for him/her it is self defeating in its stupidity. Why? A.) it’s not cool B.) it’s not cool C.) you look like a fucking idiot screaming at Bon Jovi at the top of your lungs D.) you aren’t cool singing like an idiot because Bon Jovi has been doing it for over 20 years and he still isn’t cool so what could you possibly hope to accomplish, you might as well turn down the dumbass knob in your life and not do it.
I’m done
F- Out
Failing to prevent human devolution since 1987
The fact that I even have to address this issue is beyond tedium. The hebetudinous of the people that participate in these exercises in idiocy frustrate me to the point of complete mental exhaustion. The act leaves me in a somewhat phlegmatic state, where I can do nothing but shit and piss myself while staring at my dilapidated Brookwood off white ceiling tiles. Why do the masses feel that this practice is necessary? It is completely incompetent. What I am talking about is group singing at parties.
First off, the majority of people who participate in this most likely do not listen to Bon Jovi or Journey while they are alone, so why is it necessary to scream the lyrics of these songs in a social setting with a bunch of other blithering idiots? No response? Well, fortunately for you I have formulated several hypotheses for this.
Hypothesis 1: Idiots have become self aware, if this is the case then the singing is acting as some sort of town bell, a bat signal if you will. Unlike Gotham’s Dark Knight it seems that this signal is more of a calling out to the world that, “Hey I’m a fucking idiot! Where my peers at ya herrrrrr maaayy???” Typically afterwards I would imagine they gather together in primitive groups discussing anything ranging from how many paint chips it took them to eat to get high last Tuesday or how long they tried fitting the square block in the circle hole before coming to the party.
Hypothesis 2: It is a mating call to other dumbass mother fuckers of the opposite sex. I have come to this hypothesis from extensive field work and observation. Unfortunately I believe that my IQ may have dropped a couple of points while being constantly surrounded by these individuals. BUT, that was a sacrifice I was willing to make for science. Back to what I was saying, typically a male will be in charge of the musical device and will prompt the singing (more on him later). When this happens the females will follow suit. Thus, it must be some sort of idiot mating ritual, which is probably followed by 30 seconds of belly button sex between the two.
Hypothesis 3: There is no answer. The situation is so fucking dumb that it is beyond the possibility of explanation entirely. Even through vigorous contemplation and deductive reasoning, the obtuse nature of the act must be completely incomprehensible.
One can only postulate as to which of these is actually true, some would surmise that further pontification on the subject would be dispensable. However, this is Brobrobrodude.blogspot.com, which means you need to shut that filthy fucking sewer you call a mouth and listen.
The final topic that I have to discuss before I bring this disquisition to a close, this is the subject of the fuckhole that I have deemed, “Teh Clown”.
This is the individual is the one who leads the parade of fools in song and will fall under the category of tool if in a frat/sorority. He/She is the loudest mother fuck in the immediate area, moreover, this person has the annoying characteristic of knowing every fucking word in every dumb fuck song. This person unfortunately is in control of the music device and continually puts stupid shit on, namely sing along songs. The mind reels when trying to understand the “Teh Clown” through rational thought. “Teh Clown” tries to gain recognition from their peers by doing this, unfortunately for him/her it is self defeating in its stupidity. Why? A.) it’s not cool B.) it’s not cool C.) you look like a fucking idiot screaming at Bon Jovi at the top of your lungs D.) you aren’t cool singing like an idiot because Bon Jovi has been doing it for over 20 years and he still isn’t cool so what could you possibly hope to accomplish, you might as well turn down the dumbass knob in your life and not do it.
I’m done
F- Out
Failing to prevent human devolution since 1987
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Why My Dad Is Awesome
I know what a lot of you are thinking: "Man! These BroBroBroDude guys are so awesome and funny! I wonder where they get it from!!" Well I get my awesomeness from my dad. There are tons of stories that will prove how cool my dad is. I am only going to share one with you today, but if it is a hit I'll tell you all some more. Every Fourth of July my dad would go over to his friends basement and buy ridiculous amounts of illegal fireworks. He did this partly because my brothers and I loved the firewords and partly because he loved blowing shit up. I had a cousin who came over every year to watch my dad set off these fireworks, and every year he would ask my dad three hundred million times if he could set some off. One year my dad finally gave in and let him light one off...now let me describe my cousin to you for a little. At the time he was probably around fourteen or fifteen years old. He was about 5 foot 7 and weighed like 240 pounds. He was the type of kid who's wardrobe consisted of NBA basketball jerseys and jean shorts stopped right above his ankles. So obviously I was already hoping the firecracker would go off in his hand...And it almost did. He let go at the last second and only burnt his thumb. He ran up to my dad who was setting up the next explosion; "Uncle Eddy! Uncle Eddy! I burnt my thumb what do i do?!" Now my cousin only saw my dad around the Fourth of July so he didn't know that you can't take anything he says seriously because my dad just blurts out the first thing to cross through his head and it's usually something that would never cross through anyone elses head on earth. My dad immediately told my cousin that the best way to cure a burnt thumb is to: "stick an ice cube in your ass then jam your thumb up there." Now everyone had their little laugh and went back to celebrating....until my brother walked into the backyard. He heard some groaning and grunting and decided to investigate. My brother turned the corner of our tool shed to find our porky cousin with his jeans around his knees and his thumb in his ass. This is the first example of why my dad is awesome.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Facebook Ruined Break-ups
Ending relationships has always been really uncomfortable. Thanks to Facebook, breaking up with someone is more awkward than ever. Nosy fucks that sit on Facebook all day have ruined breaking up. You have to go to your homepage and confirm the fact that you probably fucked up real bad and your girlfriend broke up with you. But it doesn’t just end there. The news of your break up instantly gets posted on ALL of your friend’s homepages. You know, because that’s exactly what you want right after someone breaks up with you; all her bitch friends and all the bros and dudes that want to fuck her getting the news that she’s single and you suck. Nothing can make you feel like more of a douche bag then looking at the post that says your relationship has ended and then looking under that and seeing that eight people “Like This”. You can just imagine all her friends at their laptops, “yeah he’s a dick, I like this and I’ll let everyone know!” But that’s not as bad as the fuckers who leave a comment on it; either her fantastic friends again letting the world know how much you suck or some tool trying to console her…with his penis. Girls know how to use Facebook perfectly after a breakup. You could date a girl for five years and over that time she’ll post like seven new pictures. But that first Sunday after the breakup you’ll see her tagged in 27 pictures and it is always in the same sequence: First are the “getting ready” pictures where it’s just her and her friends making stupid faces in the bathroom mirror while they do their hair and make-up, then comes the “pre-gaming” pictures where it’s the same group of people just inhaling shots of cheap liquor in short dresses, and then finally the party pictures where your ex girlfriends friends just follow her around with a camera and randomly select guys that she can take pictures with ( “oh my god she just broke up with the biggest asshole you two should totally kiss for the next picture!” ) Girls usually win the Facebook war when it comes to break ups. But fuck them and fuck Facebook for giving guys another obstacle to overcome after a break up.
Franklin's Rant- Attention Bigots, Homophobes, Sexists, Anti-Semites and all you other fucks
What's up fuckers? Its been about a week since I wrote anything and I felt it necessary to enlighten you ignorant bucket heads. This rant will be about the complete stupidity of racism and any form of discrimination.
Racism- noun
a belief or doctrine that inherent differences among the various human races determine cultural or individual achievement, usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule others.
This can be applied to other things, like Sex, Religion, and other things that separate one human from another.
Why racism against blacks is stupid- look, genetically, humanity has not been around long enough to have evolved to separate us from one another. All of the differences that people have from one another are purely aesthetic. "BuT, FanKlIn, whaAt abut NBA and NFL? MoSt of them r all blacck, rigHt?" Yes, that is true cock spanker, the majority of the professional athletes are African American. Hence, the assumption is that in some way African Americans are physically superior. The answer to this is buried deep in that history book you rip pages out of to roll joints. Slavery, slavery is the reason why there are so many talented black athletes. During the times of slavery, only the best strongest of both genders were brought over to the "land of the free" and they bread them like or fucking animals. So, after years of that you have people who are strong and capable. There is no extra tendon or whatever other bullshit some fucks like you believe, it is exactly what I said it was.
Why Hating Muslims is fucking dumb like you- "Wait, Wait, Wait, Frnklin, U likE Arabs? What r U, sum kinda terrrrrist?!" No you insolent buffoon, I am not a terrorist. If your pedestrian mind can wrap itself around the extra large helping of knowledge I'm going to throw at you, then maybe, maybe you will understand. I highly doubt that but, I'm going to do it anyway because I'm fucking awesome and I believe in mental charity. Not all Muslims are terrorists, furthermore, not all Muslims are fucking Arab. Wow, did you catch that? Maybe it was too fast for you so I'll retort. Not all Muslims are terrorists and not all Muslims are fucking Arab.
Countries With The Largest Muslim Populations (2009):
Country Number of Muslims
Indonesia 203 million
Pakistan 174 million
India 161 million
Bangladesh 145 million
Egypt 79 million
Nigeria 78 million
Iran 74 million
Turkey 74 million
Algeria 34 million
Morocco 32 million
Iraq 30 million
Sudan 30 million
Afghanistan 28 million
Ethiopia 28 million
Uzbekistan 26 million
Saudi Arabia 25 million
Yemen 23 million
China 22 million
Syria 20 million
Russia 16 million
You see that. Iraq doesn't even make the top ten asshole. Most Muslims aren't from the Middle East. Furthermore, we are only at War in one country from the Middle East (Hint: Afghanistan isn't the Middle East). Those numbers up there aren't even all of the Muslims in the world, it's still a lot of fucking people though. All of them couldn't be terrorists or else we would be fucked. World wide it is estimated that less than one percent of Muslims are Islamic Fundamentalists or extremists (this means terrorist doucher). Why? Because the word Islam itself means peace. "But Fanklin, Teh Koran tells muslms to Kill white people!" No, it doesn't. Any religion can be skewed to tell people to do things. Bible doesn't tell Christians to blow up abortion clinics, Catholicism doesn't tell preach for priests to rape children. People do it anyway. So shut the fuck up.
Homophobia...shut up- So, you don't like Homosexuals because they like guys and may or may not hit on you. Also, you think of homosexuals raping people in the ass and molesting children. HA HA HA, most of the pedophiles that rape children profess to be heterosexual. Another aspect to look at is, why the fuck do you even give a shit what they do? I mean really, is your life so fucked that you have to hate someone else because of who they choose to date/love or whatever? The energy that you expend being a homophobe could be directed towards something more productive, like figuring out a way to wipe you existence from the pages of human history. It baffles me when I hear someone say, "If a fag ever came up and hit on me I'd knock them the fuck out!". Why? if anything why wouldn't you say "I'm not gay" and the situation would be done. If anything you should probably flattered at the fact that both sexes find you attractive. But, you are stupid, how could I possibly have any fleeting hope that you could comprehend anything I just said.
Racism towards whites, or reverse racism...fuck- When black people are racist towards white people I just don't really get it. I mean, to a point I can understand not liking someone because they are racist, but all white people? I think that one of the most common reasons for racism towards whites is "Their ancestors enslaved my people" . What? what the fuck do you care that someone 200 years ago was enslaved by a white person, furthermore you don't know who that white person is related to. Bottom line you don't know, and if you did then what the fuck is the difference? They (the decedent of the slave owner) probably has no idea that their ancestor owned slaves. Chances are the person isn't racist, so why punish them for the actions of those people back then? It doesn't make sense at all...Oh and if it means so fucking much then why do black people (Not all black people mind you) condone a word that was used to oppress our ancestors. Rappers and other entertainment people use the words quite frequently in songs, and everyday speech. It is a travesty that "Nigga" is basically on the verge of becoming socially acceptable to say. I stand back and cannot fathom how society has gotten to this point, Fucking pathetic.
"Illegal Immigrants"- I cannot understand why people hate a group of people because they are trying to get to another country to better their lives and that of their family. "But frankliN, tey r taken jobs from ameriKans!" No mother fuck, last time I checked you weren't signing up to pick strawberries out of a field for 12hrs or work in some back kitchen of a dive restaurant. No...
Well that's all I feel like typing right now, Until next time
F- out
Racism- noun
a belief or doctrine that inherent differences among the various human races determine cultural or individual achievement, usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule others.
This can be applied to other things, like Sex, Religion, and other things that separate one human from another.
Why racism against blacks is stupid- look, genetically, humanity has not been around long enough to have evolved to separate us from one another. All of the differences that people have from one another are purely aesthetic. "BuT, FanKlIn, whaAt abut NBA and NFL? MoSt of them r all blacck, rigHt?" Yes, that is true cock spanker, the majority of the professional athletes are African American. Hence, the assumption is that in some way African Americans are physically superior. The answer to this is buried deep in that history book you rip pages out of to roll joints. Slavery, slavery is the reason why there are so many talented black athletes. During the times of slavery, only the best strongest of both genders were brought over to the "land of the free" and they bread them like or fucking animals. So, after years of that you have people who are strong and capable. There is no extra tendon or whatever other bullshit some fucks like you believe, it is exactly what I said it was.
Why Hating Muslims is fucking dumb like you- "Wait, Wait, Wait, Frnklin, U likE Arabs? What r U, sum kinda terrrrrist?!" No you insolent buffoon, I am not a terrorist. If your pedestrian mind can wrap itself around the extra large helping of knowledge I'm going to throw at you, then maybe, maybe you will understand. I highly doubt that but, I'm going to do it anyway because I'm fucking awesome and I believe in mental charity. Not all Muslims are terrorists, furthermore, not all Muslims are fucking Arab. Wow, did you catch that? Maybe it was too fast for you so I'll retort. Not all Muslims are terrorists and not all Muslims are fucking Arab.
Countries With The Largest Muslim Populations (2009):
Country Number of Muslims
Indonesia 203 million
Pakistan 174 million
India 161 million
Bangladesh 145 million
Egypt 79 million
Nigeria 78 million
Iran 74 million
Turkey 74 million
Algeria 34 million
Morocco 32 million
Iraq 30 million
Sudan 30 million
Afghanistan 28 million
Ethiopia 28 million
Uzbekistan 26 million
Saudi Arabia 25 million
Yemen 23 million
China 22 million
Syria 20 million
Russia 16 million
You see that. Iraq doesn't even make the top ten asshole. Most Muslims aren't from the Middle East. Furthermore, we are only at War in one country from the Middle East (Hint: Afghanistan isn't the Middle East). Those numbers up there aren't even all of the Muslims in the world, it's still a lot of fucking people though. All of them couldn't be terrorists or else we would be fucked. World wide it is estimated that less than one percent of Muslims are Islamic Fundamentalists or extremists (this means terrorist doucher). Why? Because the word Islam itself means peace. "But Fanklin, Teh Koran tells muslms to Kill white people!" No, it doesn't. Any religion can be skewed to tell people to do things. Bible doesn't tell Christians to blow up abortion clinics, Catholicism doesn't tell preach for priests to rape children. People do it anyway. So shut the fuck up.
Homophobia...shut up- So, you don't like Homosexuals because they like guys and may or may not hit on you. Also, you think of homosexuals raping people in the ass and molesting children. HA HA HA, most of the pedophiles that rape children profess to be heterosexual. Another aspect to look at is, why the fuck do you even give a shit what they do? I mean really, is your life so fucked that you have to hate someone else because of who they choose to date/love or whatever? The energy that you expend being a homophobe could be directed towards something more productive, like figuring out a way to wipe you existence from the pages of human history. It baffles me when I hear someone say, "If a fag ever came up and hit on me I'd knock them the fuck out!". Why? if anything why wouldn't you say "I'm not gay" and the situation would be done. If anything you should probably flattered at the fact that both sexes find you attractive. But, you are stupid, how could I possibly have any fleeting hope that you could comprehend anything I just said.
Racism towards whites, or reverse racism...fuck- When black people are racist towards white people I just don't really get it. I mean, to a point I can understand not liking someone because they are racist, but all white people? I think that one of the most common reasons for racism towards whites is "Their ancestors enslaved my people" . What? what the fuck do you care that someone 200 years ago was enslaved by a white person, furthermore you don't know who that white person is related to. Bottom line you don't know, and if you did then what the fuck is the difference? They (the decedent of the slave owner) probably has no idea that their ancestor owned slaves. Chances are the person isn't racist, so why punish them for the actions of those people back then? It doesn't make sense at all...Oh and if it means so fucking much then why do black people (Not all black people mind you) condone a word that was used to oppress our ancestors. Rappers and other entertainment people use the words quite frequently in songs, and everyday speech. It is a travesty that "Nigga" is basically on the verge of becoming socially acceptable to say. I stand back and cannot fathom how society has gotten to this point, Fucking pathetic.
"Illegal Immigrants"- I cannot understand why people hate a group of people because they are trying to get to another country to better their lives and that of their family. "But frankliN, tey r taken jobs from ameriKans!" No mother fuck, last time I checked you weren't signing up to pick strawberries out of a field for 12hrs or work in some back kitchen of a dive restaurant. No...
Well that's all I feel like typing right now, Until next time
F- out
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