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TOP 10 MANLIEST MOMENTS FROM MAN VS. WILD
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
"Shrooms" may be the best movie of all time!
Hands down if this isn't the best movie of all time, it's definitely top 10.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Dedication To Stretchy Pants
This post is a dedication to whoever convinced girls that wearing leggings as pants was a good idea. ALL MEN THANK YOU! And lesbians probably like it too we don’t discriminate here at brobrobrodude. Maybe it started as the worst walk of shame ever. The girl woke up and couldn’t find the skirt that she wore over her leggings the night before. But she’d rather walk home in tights than wake up the random dude she let slam her the night before. Half way home she noticed her butt looks ten times better when she is walking down the street essentially pantless.
Well since we are guys and we can’t give credit to girls for anything…kudos to the guy who provided sex that was awkward enough to make a girl walk home without what she thought was the most important part of her outfit. Or it could have just been some selfless boyfriend. Just because she is your girlfriend does not make it ok to hide a set of beautiful butt cheeks from the world; and this guyk new that…must’ve been a real bro…or a dude….Imagine the conversation as he watches his girlfriend get dressed for the night. “Babe, I don’t get why you even put clothes on over your leggings. Your body is so beautiful; why cover it up?” And that could be the single reason why we get to walk around and see girls pretty much half naked. So whoever started this…we all owe you one…….P.S. We all hope that if you were smart enough to get all girls to wear leggings as pants than you are also smart enough to convince fat girls to NEVER WEAR THEM
Well since we are guys and we can’t give credit to girls for anything…kudos to the guy who provided sex that was awkward enough to make a girl walk home without what she thought was the most important part of her outfit. Or it could have just been some selfless boyfriend. Just because she is your girlfriend does not make it ok to hide a set of beautiful butt cheeks from the world; and this guyk new that…must’ve been a real bro…or a dude….Imagine the conversation as he watches his girlfriend get dressed for the night. “Babe, I don’t get why you even put clothes on over your leggings. Your body is so beautiful; why cover it up?” And that could be the single reason why we get to walk around and see girls pretty much half naked. So whoever started this…we all owe you one…….P.S. We all hope that if you were smart enough to get all girls to wear leggings as pants than you are also smart enough to convince fat girls to NEVER WEAR THEM
Daily Dedication to Bear Grylls
How badass is Bear Grylls? Many a Zebra have wondered, but none dare ask.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Sorry
This is probably the only thing I will ever say sorry for even though I wasn't responsible for, so here it is. I'm sorry for the Michael J. Fox jokes, I don't want to be associated with jokes that make fun of people with disabilities. We're better than that. So, sorry.
-F
-F
Daily Dedication to Bear Grylls
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=017UzvTR3dk
Ok so the video wouldnt load but the we put up the link. This is definantly one of the best episodes of Man vs. Wild ever! Dont forget to watch a new episode tonight and every Wednesday at 9PM on Discovery.
Ok so the video wouldnt load but the we put up the link. This is definantly one of the best episodes of Man vs. Wild ever! Dont forget to watch a new episode tonight and every Wednesday at 9PM on Discovery.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Daily Brotune
First single off of Distant Relatives. Look out for the Nas and Damian Marley collaboration, the album should be hot.
Daily Dedication to Bear Grylls
In 1985 Bear Grylls hunted, killed and ate and entire village of South American Rebels and a United States Army Platoon for protein. The gruesome story was retold in 1987 in the movie “Predator.”
Throwback Chappelle's Show
| Chappelle's Show | ||||
| The Playa Hater's Ball | ||||
| ||||
This is from the first season of Chappelle's show and it is hilarious. Enjoy
Monday, January 25, 2010
Daily Brotune
Aiyyo Bo knows this (what?) and Bo knows that (what?)
But Bo don't know jack, cause Bo can't rap
Well whaddya know? the Di-Dawg is first up to bat
No batteries included, and no strings attached
No holds barred, no time for move fakin
Gots to get the loot so I can bring home the bacon
Brothers front, they say the Tribe can't flow
But we've been known to do the impossible like Broadway Joe so
Sleep if you want, my crew will help you get your Z's troop
But here's the real scoop
I'm all that and then some, short dark and handsome
Bust a nut inside your eye, to show you where I come from
I'm vexed, fumin, I've had it up to here
My days of payin dues are over, acknowledge we is in there(YEAH)
Head for the border, go get a taco
I'll be wreckin from the jump street, meaning from the get-go
Sit back relax and let yourself go
Don't sweat what you heard, and act like you know
Verse Two: Charlie Brown
Yes yes y'all (yes y'all!)
who got the vibe it's the Tribe y'all (Tribe y'all!)
real live y'all (live y'all!)
Inside outside come around... (who's that??) Browwwwwwwwn
Some may, I say, call me Charlie
The word is the herb and I'm deep like Bob Marley
Layback on the payback, [evolve rotate the gates?] CONTACT!
Can I get a hit? (HIT!)
Boom bit with a brother named Tip and we're ready to flip
East coast stompin, rippin and rompin
New York, North Cak-a-laka, and Compton
Checka-checka-check it out!
The loops for the troops, more bounce to the ounce
And wow how now wow how now Brown cow
We're ill till the skill gets down
For the flex, next, it's the textbook old to the new
but the rest are doo-doo
From radio, to the video, to Arsenio
Tell me! Yo, what's the scenario
Verse Three: Dinco D
(True blue!) Scooby Doo, whoopie doo
Scenario's ready yo, rates more than four
Scores for the snores that smother dancefloors
Now I go for mine, shave the seashore
Ship-shape crushed Grapes Apes that play tapes
Papes make drakes baked for the wakes
of an L-ah, An E-ah, simply just a leader
bass in his face means peace see ya later
Later? (LATER!) Later alligator
Pop goes the weasel and the herb's the inflater
So yo the D what the O, incorporated I-N-C into a flow
Funk flipped flat back first fist foul fight fight fight
Laugh yo how's that sound (ohhhhhh!)
Verse Four: Q-Tip, Busta Rhymes
It’s a Leader Quest mission and we got the goods here(here!)
Never on the left cause my right's my good ear (ear!)
I could give a damn about a ill subliminal
Stay away from crime SO I ain't no CRIMINAL <----
I love my young nation, groovy sensation
No time for hibernation, only elation
Don't ever try to test the water little kid
Yo Mr. Busta Rhymes, tell him what I did
I heard you rushed and rushed, AND ATTACKED
Then they rebuked and you had TO SMACK
Causin rambunction, throughout the sphere
Raise the levels of the boom, inside the ear
You know I did it
So don't violate or you get violated
The hip-hop sound is well agitated
Won't ever waste no time on the played out ego
So here's Busta Rhymes with the, Scenario
Verse Five: Busta Rhymes
Watch, as I combine all the juice from the mind
Heel up, wheel up, bring it back, come rewind
Powerful impact BOOM! from the cannon
Not braggin, try to read my mind just imagine
Vo-cab-u-lary's necessary
When diggin into my library
Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!
Eating ITAL stew like the one Peter Tosh-a
UH uh UH, all over the track, man
UH, pardon me, UH, as I come back
As I did it yo I had to beg your pardon
When I travel to the Sun I roll with the squadron
RRRRRROAW RRRRRRROAW like a dungeon dragon
Change your little drawers cause your pants are saggin
Try to step to this, I will twist you in a turban
And have u smelling rank, like some old stale urine
Chickity-choco, the chocolate chicken
The rear cockdiesel but chicks they were kicking
Yo, bustin out before the Busta bust a nut the rhyme
the rhythm is in sync (UHH!) the rhymes are on time (TIME!)
Rippin up the sound just like a radio
Observe the rhyme and check out the scenario!!
*chorus starts* Yeah, my man motherfucker!
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Things That Make You A Tool
Getting a hat customized to say that your on your schools drinking team.
Daily Brotune
Today, nobody cares
But tomorrow they will, they will
Today, nobody cares
But, oh, tomorrow they will, they will
They said my future was dark
You see me now?
Just look around
I’m beamin’
(We are) They used to talk
When I wasn’t around (Lasers)
You see me now (We’re not)
(Losers) I’m beamin’
I get my energy from my inner G
I be in outer space, but I got inner peace
So tell my enemies that they can’t injure me
I know that irritates, you have my sympathies
Well, you should protest, yeah, you should picket me
I’m on a losing strike, I’m on a winning streak
I’m out in left field, I’m speaking mentally
But that’s a better places than where the benches be
I’m feelin’ really good, me and different beat
Me and my different drummer, he play the timpanis
See, that’s what got me here, you hearin’ me
Me on my black man in the future shit, call me Billy Dee
See, I’m just forward-looking, that’s how I really see
See, while you Valentimes, I’m thinking Christmas trees
And that’s how this would be, even at Mickey D’s
Semicolon, close parentheses
They said my future was dark
You see me now?
Just look around
I’m beamin’
They used to talk
When I wasn’t around
You see me now
I’m beamin’
Do you remember me, the guy from verse one?
Failure’s my last name, Never’s my first one
You see I hood a lot, and yeah I nerd some
Hood’s where the heart is, nerd’s where the words from
Don’t represent either, because I merged them
‘S kids who wanna leave, and I encourage them
Go out and see the world, never return from
Yeah, you don’t come back, unless you learn some
And baby girl, what does it matter where your purse from?
Your hurr done, your nails did, your ass fat, but you’re dumb
Mix Melyssa Ford with Maya Angelou
Become a top model and Sojourner too
I try to follow this, what Muhammad do
It’s such a old soul inside the sonic youth
Swear I’m Ferrari’d up, and I’m conscious, too
I don’t prophesize: I promise you
They said my future was dark
You see me now?
Just look around
I’m beamin’
They used to talk
When I wasn’t around (Lasers)
You see me now (Ha)
I’m beamin’
Yeah, it’s me again, the guy from verse two
Well, this the last one, it’s almost curfew
It’s almost night out, so turn your lights on
Where all my 760s, witcha brights on?
Yeah, they are the ones to keep your eyes on
Like how we used to do, to keep the house warm
Now those the type of eyes, I not cry from
You see the tears of fire run out my cryin’ songs
Now the world’s shoulders is what we cryin’ on
The world’s fast lane is what I’m drivin’ on
What am I driving at? I’m tryna drive it home
I’m in the driver’s seat, but you can ride along
‘Cause never cyclops, it’s never I alone
I’m tellin’ your story wherever I perform
Now if they lookin’ for me, tell ‘em I’ve gone
Out in the bright lights, right where I belong
They said my future was dark
You see me now?
Just look around
I’m beamin’
They used to talk
When I wasn’t around
You see me now
I’m beamin’
Our Letter To M. Night Shyamalan
Dear M. Night Shyamalan,
I don’t know whether to thank you or tell you to go fuck yourself. You wrote and directed the 2008 film “The Happening”. This is both the worst and best movie I have ever watched. It is one of the dumbest movies ever made, but the completely ridiculous plot and awful acting makes it very entertaining…when you’re very very high. After I watched “The Happening” I couldn’t decide if you were just an asshole who wanted to show everyone that you could make the shittiest movie ever and still be rich or if you just paid someone to scramble your brain with a power drill and wrote down whatever came to mind. What the fuck were you thinking? “I have the perfect idea for my next movie! Check it out! People are going to start to say stupid shit that makes no sense, then walk around backwards for a little bit, and then they are just going to kill themselves in the most inconvenient and hilarious ways possible….oh yeah and the trees are the bad guys.” Fuck you M. Night Shyamalan. I will give you credit for the ways that the people in the movie kill themselves though. Five minutes into the movie an entire construction crew just swan dives one by one off the roof of the building. At one point some lady pulls out her iphone at a diner to show a video that her sister had sent her. The video is of some guy in a zoo who has been infected by the scary killer tree air who decides to wave his arm in taunting motions in front of a lions face until the lion finally says “fuck it” and eats him.
What kind of dickhead sees a guy about to get his shit fucked up by a lion and thinks to pull out their iphone, video tape it, and send it out to all their friends? You managed to turn Mark Wahlberg, who is badass in every movie, into a crybaby pussy. Oh, and great ending you idiot. The trees just give up and stop killing people for no reason at all…in America at least. For some reason they go to France. Maybe you were setting everyone up for the sequel: “It’s Happening Again: Don’t Even Bother Watching”. Well M. Night Shyamalan, fuck you and suck my dick.
Sincerely,
BroBroBroDude
I don’t know whether to thank you or tell you to go fuck yourself. You wrote and directed the 2008 film “The Happening”. This is both the worst and best movie I have ever watched. It is one of the dumbest movies ever made, but the completely ridiculous plot and awful acting makes it very entertaining…when you’re very very high. After I watched “The Happening” I couldn’t decide if you were just an asshole who wanted to show everyone that you could make the shittiest movie ever and still be rich or if you just paid someone to scramble your brain with a power drill and wrote down whatever came to mind. What the fuck were you thinking? “I have the perfect idea for my next movie! Check it out! People are going to start to say stupid shit that makes no sense, then walk around backwards for a little bit, and then they are just going to kill themselves in the most inconvenient and hilarious ways possible….oh yeah and the trees are the bad guys.” Fuck you M. Night Shyamalan. I will give you credit for the ways that the people in the movie kill themselves though. Five minutes into the movie an entire construction crew just swan dives one by one off the roof of the building. At one point some lady pulls out her iphone at a diner to show a video that her sister had sent her. The video is of some guy in a zoo who has been infected by the scary killer tree air who decides to wave his arm in taunting motions in front of a lions face until the lion finally says “fuck it” and eats him.
What kind of dickhead sees a guy about to get his shit fucked up by a lion and thinks to pull out their iphone, video tape it, and send it out to all their friends? You managed to turn Mark Wahlberg, who is badass in every movie, into a crybaby pussy. Oh, and great ending you idiot. The trees just give up and stop killing people for no reason at all…in America at least. For some reason they go to France. Maybe you were setting everyone up for the sequel: “It’s Happening Again: Don’t Even Bother Watching”. Well M. Night Shyamalan, fuck you and suck my dick.
Sincerely,
BroBroBroDude
Franklin's Rant- Why frats and sororities fucking blow but im still awesome
So, I'm no longer writing a weekly rant. I think it will be more like Franklin's whenever the fuck I feel like it because it's fucking congress ass raper and you'll fucking like it rant. So, you'll just have to keep checking to find out what pisses me off besides you.
I've been thinking for a while about how frats and sororities piss me off. I know what you are thinking and saying at you pornmachine, "But FrankLin, arEn't u in a Frat? LOL?!" Yes fuck face, I am in a fraternity. But, who would be more of an expert on why they suck than someone who is in "Greek life".
For the sake of organization I have created categories for each of the people that are in the greek organizations. You probably don't understand because you are fucking stupid, but I'm sure you will catch on.
Fraternities:
The Tool: This guy tries to rip his personality from the silver screen of movies such as "Van Wilder", "Old School", etc. etc. He is a doucher and has cronies who typically follow him around. He is always down for "gettin fucked up" "fuckin Bitches" and constantly brags a how many "Bitches" they get with, even though it is probably limited to his hand, and that kid he touched penises with at recess in the 5th grade.
The man whore: This guy can be alright to hang out with, for guys. Girls to this person are disposable objects and talks shit to them constantly. The funniest part about this is that typically, girls know how many girls the guy has been with and still get with him. Why? because they are fucking dumb...
That Guy: This guy typically lifts weights constantly, finds an excuse to take off his shirt in public places, most likely plays ultimate frizbee, and watches fucking Jersey Shore. He is also that guy at the gym that when you want to get on the bench, says that he has like 40 more sets to do in his cut off under armor shirt. You have seen them, you probably know one, or two. They are fucking lame. Oh yeah and you can typically spot him checking out his "Swell" at the gym mirror...fucking asshole
Me: Well, I think it is obvious that I am probably one of the most diabolical of the classes of Frat people. What is this class called you ask? Well shit eater it is the hater, as the name implies I hate on everything and everyone. Why? because it is fun.
Sororities
The Conceited Bitch: This person is interesting, they have fun with people, seem pretty cool, and is everyone's "friend". But, they talk shit, manipulative,and narcissistic. Everything is very cloak and dagger, behind the scenes, ghost recon shit. Typically she is mistaken for another class that will be discussed later.
The Skank: There are different types of this class of human. Some are clandestine sluts (Clandestine means secret asshole), overt skank, and then the "black out" skank. The last one is probably the most interesting, she claims blacking out as a means of justification for the actions. "Haha OmG, I don't remember it I was blacked out ROFLLLLLLLL!!!!!" ...no... just because you don't remember doesn't mean it didn't happen, you fuck.
The Drama Queen: This chick needs little explanation. Instigating, attention seeking, dramatizing, crying, puking and all that shit. She often over steps her bounds within a group of people. Before people start talking shit and crying like a bunch of bitch ass dick faces, by over stepping bounds I mean...hmm for instance, making fun someone that they barely know within the social group and she finds it okay. This person often comes up and talks to you for at least a half an hour about something that you don't care about and at the end of the conversation you wished one of several things happened mid conversation. A) she stopped talking B) You had a massive blood clot in your brain causing your head to explode C) You were a big enough dickhead to just walk away.
The Cool Chick: Well, this class is pretty self explanatory. This girl typically hangs out with the guys and can interact without having it be awkward. This person is enjoyable to be around and most of the time keeps it real. But, they can only keep it so real cause this person is in "greek life" so they must have some kind of fucking damage.
Well, Until next time
F out
I've been thinking for a while about how frats and sororities piss me off. I know what you are thinking and saying at you pornmachine, "But FrankLin, arEn't u in a Frat? LOL?!" Yes fuck face, I am in a fraternity. But, who would be more of an expert on why they suck than someone who is in "Greek life".
For the sake of organization I have created categories for each of the people that are in the greek organizations. You probably don't understand because you are fucking stupid, but I'm sure you will catch on.
Fraternities:
The Tool: This guy tries to rip his personality from the silver screen of movies such as "Van Wilder", "Old School", etc. etc. He is a doucher and has cronies who typically follow him around. He is always down for "gettin fucked up" "fuckin Bitches" and constantly brags a how many "Bitches" they get with, even though it is probably limited to his hand, and that kid he touched penises with at recess in the 5th grade.
The man whore: This guy can be alright to hang out with, for guys. Girls to this person are disposable objects and talks shit to them constantly. The funniest part about this is that typically, girls know how many girls the guy has been with and still get with him. Why? because they are fucking dumb...
That Guy: This guy typically lifts weights constantly, finds an excuse to take off his shirt in public places, most likely plays ultimate frizbee, and watches fucking Jersey Shore. He is also that guy at the gym that when you want to get on the bench, says that he has like 40 more sets to do in his cut off under armor shirt. You have seen them, you probably know one, or two. They are fucking lame. Oh yeah and you can typically spot him checking out his "Swell" at the gym mirror...fucking asshole
Me: Well, I think it is obvious that I am probably one of the most diabolical of the classes of Frat people. What is this class called you ask? Well shit eater it is the hater, as the name implies I hate on everything and everyone. Why? because it is fun.
Sororities
The Conceited Bitch: This person is interesting, they have fun with people, seem pretty cool, and is everyone's "friend". But, they talk shit, manipulative,and narcissistic. Everything is very cloak and dagger, behind the scenes, ghost recon shit. Typically she is mistaken for another class that will be discussed later.
The Skank: There are different types of this class of human. Some are clandestine sluts (Clandestine means secret asshole), overt skank, and then the "black out" skank. The last one is probably the most interesting, she claims blacking out as a means of justification for the actions. "Haha OmG, I don't remember it I was blacked out ROFLLLLLLLL!!!!!" ...no... just because you don't remember doesn't mean it didn't happen, you fuck.
The Drama Queen: This chick needs little explanation. Instigating, attention seeking, dramatizing, crying, puking and all that shit. She often over steps her bounds within a group of people. Before people start talking shit and crying like a bunch of bitch ass dick faces, by over stepping bounds I mean...hmm for instance, making fun someone that they barely know within the social group and she finds it okay. This person often comes up and talks to you for at least a half an hour about something that you don't care about and at the end of the conversation you wished one of several things happened mid conversation. A) she stopped talking B) You had a massive blood clot in your brain causing your head to explode C) You were a big enough dickhead to just walk away.
The Cool Chick: Well, this class is pretty self explanatory. This girl typically hangs out with the guys and can interact without having it be awkward. This person is enjoyable to be around and most of the time keeps it real. But, they can only keep it so real cause this person is in "greek life" so they must have some kind of fucking damage.
Well, Until next time
F out
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