Facebook Ruined Break-ups

Ending relationships has always been really uncomfortable. Thanks to Facebook, breaking up with someone is more awkward than ever. Nosy fucks that sit on Facebook all day have ruined breaking up. You have to go to your homepage and confirm the fact that you probably fucked up real bad and your girlfriend broke up with you. But it doesn’t just end there. The news of your break up instantly gets posted on ALL of your friend’s homepages. You know, because that’s exactly what you want right after someone breaks up with you; all her bitch friends and all the bros and dudes that want to fuck her getting the news that she’s single and you suck. Nothing can make you feel like more of a douche bag then looking at the post that says your relationship has ended and then looking under that and seeing that eight people “Like This”. You can just imagine all her friends at their laptops, “yeah he’s a dick, I like this and I’ll let everyone know!” But that’s not as bad as the fuckers who leave a comment on it; either her fantastic friends again letting the world know how much you suck or some tool trying to console her…with his penis. Girls know how to use Facebook perfectly after a breakup. You could date a girl for five years and over that time she’ll post like seven new pictures. But that first Sunday after the breakup you’ll see her tagged in 27 pictures and it is always in the same sequence: First are the “getting ready” pictures where it’s just her and her friends making stupid faces in the bathroom mirror while they do their hair and make-up, then comes the “pre-gaming” pictures where it’s the same group of people just inhaling shots of cheap liquor in short dresses, and then finally the party pictures where your ex girlfriends friends just follow her around with a camera and randomly select guys that she can take pictures with ( “oh my god she just broke up with the biggest asshole you two should totally kiss for the next picture!” ) Girls usually win the Facebook war when it comes to break ups. But fuck them and fuck Facebook for giving guys another obstacle to overcome after a break up.